I recently read a story about a woman who could not wear a face mask (as encouraged by many health professionals and lawmakers) because she had PTSD.

She described speaking with the woman at the front desk of her doctor’s office on the phone, describing that she cannot wear a face mask when she comes for her appointment, but that she did not want to share why and HIPAA protected her privacy.

By the end of the phone call, she praises her doctor’s staff for their understanding and decides to share her medical problem with the kind woman on the phone. 

She had been sexually assaulted. While it was happening, her attacker covered her face with his hand. Now, when she wears a mask, her PTSD is triggered. 

As my husband and I discussed this woman’s story, we began to talk about all the other people who may suffer from wearing a mask. We discussed scenario after scenario of things that could make people uncomfortable wearing a mask.

Many of our hypothetical situations had to do with psychological trauma and mental illness – invisible illnesses if you will. 

Here’s part of the problem in today’s world. We (often) believe our morals and values are right and that others should fall in line with them. If they chose not to, they’re (at the least) less intelligent or (at the most) unable to be our friend.

When it comes to COVID-19, there seems to be two sides of the fence and you’re being forced to stand on one or the other. We talk about people by the masses. 

“Everyone should wear a face mask; if you don’t, you’re inconsiderate.”

“Face masks don’t help and you’re taking away my rights by forcing me to wear one.” 

Rarely have I met many people in the middle. 

And again, that’s the problem. We expect everyone to fall in line with what we think is right. 

My husband is an identical twin. He and his brother were roommates for twenty-three years of life. It’s not a relationship I even pretend to understand (hello. Only child here.) Not only did they live together, but they often kept the same company. Many of their life experiences were experienced together, at the same time. 

But you know what? Many of these experiences affected each of them differently. Some things that were pivotal to one, the other has no strong feelings toward. 

Do you know why? Because we are all created individually, in the image and likeness of Him.

There won’t ever be anyone like us. 

Okay, okay, Bonnie. Enough with the religion lesson.

What’s the point? 

The point is we all have different experiences. These experiences shape our world views. And because your experience is different than mine, it doesn’t devalue what I saw or felt, not does it make your feelings less valid.

I think the worst part of this pandemic and all the time we’ve spent in isolation is that we are becoming less humane. We’re social distancing, so we’re forgetting that these people that aren’t doing what we think is right are people too – people with their own unique experiences. Some we know nothing of. 

Instead of jumping to condemnation, I wish we would give a little more grace. 

Maybe the woman not wearing a mask has asthma and can’t breathe while she’s got it on.

Maybe the man without one has PTSD. Maybe the child who looks old enough to have a mask on has special needs. 

Maybe the man reprimanding people for not wearing a mask is a respiratory therapist in the ICU and is seeing men and women dying from this disease.

Maybe the woman wearing her mask everywhere and insisting on social distancing has an immunodeficiency because of chemotherapy and doesn’t want to risk getting sick with something that could distract her from the fight of her life. 

Maybe… maybe… maybe…

Grace. We have to learn to give grace.Not everyone will do or believe as we think they should. 

But that doesn’t mean Jesus loves them any less…

…and neither should you.